Obsession......

I'm obsessed with Ashlyn's nose. She's had a bit of a stuffy nose since Easter. Some days she's fine and some days its sounds like she can hardly get any oxygen through it. I can't handle it when she's got a crusty nose, so I'm always trying to pick her boogies or at least wipe her nose. This does not make her happy at all! But I can't stop myself, if she's got boogie, I go after it. :)

She had to have another shot today. So many vaccines, but I know we have to do it. She only cried a little bit. Made me feel super guilty! The look on her face is terrible and her cry sounds like she knows she's been tricked. I'm sure this is only going to get worse each time we go as she gets older. Ugh!! She weighed 13.5 lbs and that's in the 75th percentile. At least we know she's not starving! Poor thing got her mom's short legs though. Her 3 month jeans are too tight around her belly but still too long.

We've been catching her sucking her thumb more often. Robyn at Wee Care says she catches her too. I'm afraid this might be a losing battle. We're still swaddling her at night so she gets the soothie then. Who knows what will happen when she starts getting her arms out, we might have a thumb-sucker on our hands!

She's doing great at Wee Care. She takes really long naps most days. Usually about a 3 hour nap in the morning and another 2-3 hour nap in the afternoon. She's been sleeping through the night again, thank goodness! We were so tired last week with her waking up at 3am 4 mornings in a row.

Jered's going to Lincoln City tomorrow for Eli's bachelor party so it's just me, Ashlyn and the dogs. We're going down to Monroe Sat for my cousin's baby shower. They're having a boy and naming him Mason. That was on my list for boy's names. So cute!!

Sorry there's no new pictures. Next post!

Recovering from our week....

We had a very quiet weekend. By the time Friday rolled around, I was so tired! Ashlyn and I came right home, changed into our pj's and vegged out on the couch. Jered was in Seattle taking his Washington lisence so it was just me and Ashlyn. We cuddled on the couch and I just held her. I missed her so much this week I just needed to hold her. Its crazy how much we love her. This tiny little needy, impatient, loud, beautiful, funny, amusing, fun, greedy, frustrating, rewarding baby girl has completely changed our lives. I can't even imagine life without her. Everyone says your life will never be the same, and they are right but its in the best way.

Saturday and Sunday we just bummed around the house. We were supposed to go to a baby shower Saturday for one of Jered's co-workers but Ashlyn kept throwing up. She threw up about 4 times after her bottle and we thought that maybe we should take her in to the doctor. We calmed down and realized she was probably just over-eating so we cut her bottles back a little and she's been fine ever since. She was back to sleeping through the night too. I'm hoping when we go back to work tomorrow she'll be a little more used to Wee Care and won't sleep all day. When she sleeps all day at day care she doesn't want to sleep at night. Which is why we were so tired this weekend, trying to catch up on some of our sleep. Well its time for Ashlyn's bath......

Daddy being silly!

3 months

Well I'm back to work! Monday was really difficult, I shed more than a few tears. I cried on the way too work, I cried when I got there, I cried when I had to leave her. I went to see her at lunch and I cried when I had to leave her again. Then I cried again when I picked her up to go home. It was just really hard to not be with her. I know she's in good hands, they're really great at Wee Care. It was just hard. Tuesday was a little easier, I only shed a few tears when I left her in the morning and today no tears at all! I'm glad to be back at work though. Its been great catching up with everyone, hearing all the gossip and everything that happened while I was gone. Today is my day off so I've slept in and now I'm going to spend the whole day with Ashlyn.

They tell me that Ashlyn has done really well adapting to her new environment. It's just mom that's having a hard time. She's napping well, taking her bottles well and loving all the toys they have. She's been sleeping a lot but they tell me that's normal. She's being over-stimulated and just shuts down by sleeping so she can recharge. Once she gets more used to all the noise and other babies she should interact more. She's still sleeping well at home, although the last two nights she woke up an hour earlier than usual at 4am instead of 5am. There was no getting her to go back to sleep, poking the soothie back in her mouth was not working. They tell me this is normal too and once she's adjusted she should get back to "normal".

Jered and I started the 30 Day Shred program on Sunday night. Its a 30 minute workout for 30 days in row and its kicking our butts. Its really hard, lots of pushups, jumping jacks, lunges, crunches. But it feels really good to be working out again and we're helping each other stay on track. We have a wedding in Vegas Memorial weekend so we gotta try to get in a little bit of shape before then.

Yesterday was Ashlyn's 3 month birthday. 3 months ago Jered and I spent a sleepness night in the hospital staring at our new daughter. We were amazed by her! Amazed that she was ours, amazed that she was finally here, amazed that this little tiny human came out of MY (huge) belly. Now 3 months later she "talks" to us, smiles at us, recognizes our voices, our faces. We've learned her different cries. We know when she's hungry, sleepy, needs a new diaper, wants attention or just to be left alone. She's sleeping about 8 hours at night, which has been awesome for Jered and I.

She likes sitting in her bouncy chair, but only for about 10 min because that's about when she realizes you're doing something else and not paying attention to her. She loves music, the swing, and the ceiling fan. She loves looking at the ladybugs on the wallpaper border in her room when I'm changing her diaper. She'll lay in her crib smiling and talking to her ladybug mobile. She knows her nighttime routine and by 83o she starts to get a little crabby if we dont get started on her bath. She absolutely LOVES her bath! She hates to be hot and gets real crabby if she is. She only likes her soothies we got home from the hospital and if we try to give her any other kind of pacifer she just pops it right back out. She's recently found her hand and has started to suck on it. I'm afraid soon she'll find the thumb and then we'll never get it away from her. We try to only give the soothie when she's napping or at night. We can take the soothie away, we can't take her thumb away!



First day of work and wee care.

It was red day at wee care.

It was really hot this week and she didn't want any clothes on. She was a much calmer kid when we stripped down to her diaper.

Playing and watching mama and daddy do their shred workout.

Today in her bouncer. She can't get enough of that zebra. Today was green day at wee care so we're participating from home.

Going back to work tomorrow!

We had a great weekend! The weather was so beautiful it makes all those snow and rain days worth it. We took the dogs and Ashlyn and drove over to the coast on Friday. It was pretty foggy but we had fun. We bundled Ashlyn up in two coats, a hat and wrapped a blanket around her legs before putting her in the Bjorn. The dogs thought they'd died and gone to heaven I'm sure. There was so much sand in their noses after chasing the ball but they didn't seem to mind at all. Saturday was spent at Jered's grandparents house tearing down a wisteria bush that had taken over the barn. It had grown through the roof and covered one entire wall of the barn, crazy. Ashlyn wasn't feeling her best yesterday so she was a bit crabby. She's had a stuffy nose the past few days but seems to be feeling better today. Today we did some yard work of our own and then went for a drive, stopping at a couple of wineries. Tomorrow is work. Work, work, work. Its going to take a few days, maybe even a couple of weeks to get back into my usual routine. I'll be visiting Ashlyn on my lunch breaks so that will be a nice break in my day. They are doing colors this week at daycare and tomorrow is red day so since its nice I've picked out a cute red dress for her to wear. We'll take a picture if we're not rushing of her first day of "school".

So Jered and I did our first workout tonight of the 30 day shred. Its by that lady from the biggest loser. Totally kicked our butts! Its all old school stuff: pushups, squats, lunges, jumping jacks. Seriously kicked our butts, I probably won't be able to walk tomorrow! Anyway you're supposed to do it for 30 days straight. Its only 20 minutes but you don't get any breaks. There are three levels and needless to say we're at level one and I know I'll be a level one for a while! Gotta get back into shape, as soon as I stopped breastfeeding I gained back like 7 or 8 lbs. Sucks! I didn't have any trouble losing weight after Ashlyn, it just disappeared. I was about 10 lbs under my pre-pregnancy weight in about 2 weeks. It had to be the breastfeeding and its just another reason why I'm disappointed Ashlyn refused to breastfeed. Another reason is the gluten-free cupcakes I can no longer eat. The best gf cupcakes are at New Cascadia on 21st and Glisan downtown, just in case anyone wants to try 'em!



The girls sunning themselves at grandma and granpa's house.

Taking a walk on Cannon Beach..

Our family!

My last week

This is my last week of maternity leave. I have to go back to work on Monday. I'm a little excited to go back and get back to my normal schedule but its going to be so hard to drop Ashlyn off at Wee Care Monday morning. These last few days I haven't wanted to be away from her for too long. I'm stocking up on Ashlyn time. It'll be good for both of us though. She'll be around other kids and I won't lose my mind staying at home. In ideal world though I'd work part time, maybe three days a week. Unfortunately neither Jered or I have ever been able to find that silver spoon we're missing!

Jered has been off this week as well (work is slow) so we've been hanging out. Its nice to have him home with us. Monday was his 30th birthday, and the only day he actually had to work. He worked in the morning then we to lunch at CPK and came home and he made us margaritas. We visited Wee Care on Tues and today we dropped all of her stuff off so she's ready to go on Monday. Just diapers, wipes, extra outfits and a couple of blankets. Today was a beautiful day so this afternoon Jered made us more margs and we sat out on the deck with Ashlyn. Wonderful life!

Here's a few pictures.....


Today at Fire on the Mountain (best chicken wings) looking too cool for school in her sunglasses.

Talking on the phone last night.

Last nights bath, she loves her baths.

Me and Ashlyn yesterday morning.

Easter Weekend

Ashlyn in her first pair of jeans and the shirt Daddy bought her.


Just a cute one of Ashlyn I couldn't resist adding to the blog.

We had a busy weekend! We drove down to my mom's on Friday afternoon and had dinner at my brother's house. After dinner Grammie stayed with the three girls so we could go down to the Long Branch and have a drink with our cousin's Traci, Steve and his fiance Krissy. It was nice to have a little adult time, even at the Branch!

Saturday was the surprise party for my Uncle David's 70th birthday and I do think he was pretty surprised. My Uncle Rick flew up from New Mexico to surprise him too. Saturday night my mom and I went up to visit with all my aunts and uncles at Aunt Sharon and Uncle Jerry's. My family loves to talk and we were there till after 11pm, I was forcing mom out the door!

Sunday was Easter and we all got together again for food and more talking and lots of pictures. The only thing besides talking this family loves more is taking pictures and there was lots of those too.

Ashlyn handled begin passed around from relative to relative for two days relatively well. She's pretty tired tonight though so its bath, bottle and bed time for her. All in all it was a great weekend.

These are my Aunts and Uncles from left to right is Uncle Rick, Uncle Bob, Uncle Gary, Uncle David, Uncle Jerry, my mom, Aunt Jean, Aunt Judy and Aunt Gwenda!

These are most of my second and third cousins, I'm sure there are a few missing. That's my cousin Ashley holding Ashlyn.

Bailey, Macy and Ashlyn in the Easter dresses Grammie and Grampa bought them. Ashlyn was not too happy having to wear that hat, but it looked so darned cute on her.

This is me with my cousin Heidi. Her new daughter Alice is just about 6 weeks younger than Ashlyn. I can hardly believe how big Ashlyn has gotten but seeing her next to Alice really made it obvious. And to think just a few weeks ago Ashlyn was that small too :)

A picture with Grammie, she always closes her eyes!

First overnight

We had our first overnight and we had a great time. My mom and Eddie got here a little before noon on Saturday and we headed out with Justin & Steph to a few wineries in Forest Grove area. We managed 4 wineries and a stop at our friend's wine shop all before 5pm. Oh yeah, we're good! Tasted some great and not so great wine. Then on to Grand Lodge where we had way too much to eat for dinner! We took a soak in the soaking pool, then hung out at one of the bars before going to bed. I think we made it back to our room about 1:30 am, yep AM! After a full day of drinking fun you would've thought we would sleep in but we were up and having breakfast by 8:30am. Then we hurried home to see Ashlyn because we missed her SO much! I only called my mom once Sat night to check on her, but by this morning I was ready to see her and squeeze her and kiss her!!!

At the wineries

Smiling at Mama

Tummy time

Hangin' with Daddy

So a couple of weeks ago Ashlyn decided she didn't want to breast feed anymore. She would scream her little head off and we'd be lucky to get a few minutes out of her before she turned into a little screaming banshee. So I started pumping more...again. And my supply dropped drastically. Supply was always a huge deal for us since we've had to supliment from the very beginning. I was getting extremely frustrated, Ashlyn was just plain pissed off and poor Jered just tried to stay out of the way of his two screaming females. After a particulary frustrating 4am feeding this morning, I have officially thrown in the towel.

My goal from the very beginning was to go at least three months when I would have to go back to work. After our bumpy beginning we were smooth sailing for quite a few weeks and I thought maybe we'd get at least 6 months but Ashlyn made the decision for us. Part of me is seriously disappointed, part of me is just relieved. Its been a really rough couple of weeks! Its close to impossible to make a 10 week old do what you want her to when she's pretty much decided she's not going to do it.

As most women know, breastfeeding is very personal. Its something only you can do for your baby and I was really happy that it was working out for us. So needless to say part of me feels a little bit like a failure. Although I know that we did the best we could and a little bit is better than none. So now she's on soy formula only and its ok, it really is because we're both a lot happier today.