So a couple of weeks ago Ashlyn decided she didn't want to breast feed anymore. She would scream her little head off and we'd be lucky to get a few minutes out of her before she turned into a little screaming banshee. So I started pumping more...again. And my supply dropped drastically. Supply was always a huge deal for us since we've had to supliment from the very beginning. I was getting extremely frustrated, Ashlyn was just plain pissed off and poor Jered just tried to stay out of the way of his two screaming females. After a particulary frustrating 4am feeding this morning, I have officially thrown in the towel.

My goal from the very beginning was to go at least three months when I would have to go back to work. After our bumpy beginning we were smooth sailing for quite a few weeks and I thought maybe we'd get at least 6 months but Ashlyn made the decision for us. Part of me is seriously disappointed, part of me is just relieved. Its been a really rough couple of weeks! Its close to impossible to make a 10 week old do what you want her to when she's pretty much decided she's not going to do it.

As most women know, breastfeeding is very personal. Its something only you can do for your baby and I was really happy that it was working out for us. So needless to say part of me feels a little bit like a failure. Although I know that we did the best we could and a little bit is better than none. So now she's on soy formula only and its ok, it really is because we're both a lot happier today.